>Can you say, "high maintenance?"

>I’d about kill for a Diet Coke, but I’m stuck with water. Better for me, I know. But, the hours are closing in until I take off–twenty to be exact. My week? Here’s a little peek…

Okay, I don’t want to check-in my luggage, so I’ll take a carry on. Oh, wait…I want to bring my manuscript. I’ll need to put that in my brief case. I’ll pack that, too. Don’t want to lug that around the airport. Shoes: comfortable or beautiful? It’s a writing conference; I’m going with comfortable. They need polishing. Done. Oh God, what about my pillow. My pillow’s been around the globe. Last stop was Sicily. I’ll call the hotel and see if they have down pillows. I can’t risk a neck ache. Yes! They have down pillows; one less thing to pack. Alright, now for the outfit for the writer’s banquet. I want the business casual look, so of course, black pants and a black sweater. It’s not a funeral, though. I need a splash of color. Nothing at J.Jill, Chico’s, or any other store. T.J. Max it is. Why don’t I learn? Perfect–a fuchsia blouse, brings my face to life. Speaking of which, I’m a little pale. Nothing wrong with a round of bronzer. That’s done. Now for the search for a dozen cosmetics under three ounces. Another trip to the store. Thank you, CVS. Taxis. Haven’t taken a taxi by myself since…never. I’ll just Google taxi services in Albuquerque. Wow, $2.40 a mile. I need to pull out some cash. Over a hundred, under a hundred? What if I lose my purse or get mugged. Speaking of purse, I need that snappy black one my cousin Lisa handed down. Phone–charged. Ipod–charged. Whew…I think I’m ready.


Thanks to Nora Ephron and her witty writing in When Harry Met Sally, I learned the name of my diagnosis: High Maintenance. Now, unlike Sally, I’m not the worst kind: thinking I’m low maintenance when I’m really high maintenance. No, I know what I am. Plus, I have this thing called a family who is kind enough to remind me of this!

As I contemplated this on my walk with Alfi (my precious Havanese), it dawned on me that I am growing into the very person that used to send me ranting and raving. I’m the fifty-five year old woman (that’s figurative, not literal!) who cripples at spontaneous moments and needs hours of planning to leave her environment for less than a day. What is happening to me? (This is a rhetorical question…please, be kind.)  I know some of you can relate.

So, here’s how I see it: this is a dry run for when I will start my future book tour. I will have it down (how’s that for a positive spin.) That, or I will start self-medicating the week before, next time. Kidding…maybe.


4 thoughts on “>Can you say, "high maintenance?"

  1. >Dontcha just love being a woman? A zillion details to occupy our minds while men are content with one outfit, one pair of shoes, a toothbrush and a comb (and maybe not even the comb). Smart girl opting for comfortable shoes, and for me, earplugs are a must for a good night's sleep 😉 I'll be rooting for you the whole time, eager to bend your ear when you return!!

  2. >Thanks for the shout-out Susan! You should have come by to shop my closet…I could have taken your high maintenance to the next level. As a frequent flyer, be sure your shoes are of the slip-off variety for security. Make sure your outfit has at least one deep, accessible pocket for your ID and boarding pass. Pack your carry-ons just so…and always, dispose of your bottled water BEFORE you get to the front of the security line. Can't wait to hear how it goes! Have so much fun! We're all so proud of you and love the humor you bring to ever blog post!

  3. >I could feel your anxiety right through the computer! (Or was it my own??)So much to think about for an overnight trip. Your gift of writing is an amazing blessing. I agree… this is just the dry run for your future book tour!Readng about your preparations for the trip reminds of traveling when my kiddos were young. Specifically, a wonderful trip to Sweden. I miss traveling!It is always a delight to read your insightful work! I can't wait to hear about your trip!

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